Thank You For Saying Thank You

I Like The Back Of The Bus...All Things Can Be Clearly Seen.
From Behind One Can See Everyone Who Is Before Them...And Why.
Matthew 20: 16

I have a difficult time accepting praise.

Not sure if this is because I didn't receive much praise as a child.

Perhaps it is inversely similar to not hearing “I love you” very much from my relatives, while I knew deep in my heart they did love me.

Hearing praise is different for me.

Directly not hearing praise or encouragement from doing something good or right while growing up perhaps makes hearing praise as an adult a bit doubtful.

Maybe it is a challenge to my pride...pride being one of the myriad of things I know I struggle with.


Throughout my adult life, when I would be thanked for something or someone would gush over me in front of others, I would practically squirm on the inside.

I still do.

It happened again this morning.

In my heart I am praising God and I can't help but be reminded that for me to take any credit for anything 'good' would be quite arrogant in the least, or quite narrow-minded in the most.

Maybe my inner dialogue is unnoticeable, and perhaps I graciously display gratitude for any praise mentioned.

We all don't wear our hearts on our sleeves, although some of us desire to.

I desire to.

Some things cannot be fully expressed; for not every audience can recognize what is genuine when they've been presented phoniness almost all their lives.

There is a time when one can be grateful for the praise they receive...and say 'thank you' to the praise of others.

I am still learning.

I think it is how I could express gratitude that is difficult to navigate.

I've seen enough examples in real life and in the media of people being praised for the most ridiculous of things, and those receiving misguided praise being filled with hot air.

Have you noticed how in some cultures a woman is praised by men for the form and shape of her body, yet she had nothing to do with its shape or form...besides her current attempts to do something about it, now after the fact?

Or how a man is praised for his attitude or his perceived power over another man perceived to be at a lower position according to some economic metric, yet the character metric in both men is typically ignored.

All women, as men, are beautiful in their own way when we look past the outer shell of humanity...yet our outer shells tell a different story from what is being told on the inside.

We do need to praise children for the smallest things they do, for every little victory and triumph of theirs, as much as we desire to correct them when they reflect our fallen humanity.

We also should praise adults when they do merit a good word.

But so we praise an adult for doing what is expected?

Plenty of adults go about their life like selfish children, and others oddly praise them.

Maybe this is why I am internally challenged when receiving praise for what I consider to be a basic approach to life; aiming to do what is right and what is expected.

I think people have been convinced that something is 'right' when it has always been wrong...and vice versa.

We truly live in an upside down world, and the world doesn't understand how to right their ship, giving praise for the most detestable of things and the banality of life being praised as a triumph of mankind.

If I were to be fully comfortable with accepting praise, I would likely be tempted to 'do' and 'say' things in beckoning more praise, like an actor or performer on a stage does.

I've walked such phoniness around the block enough times to know how much work that is.

That work isn't as fulfilling as the work to be honest, present and real...even when fielding an offensive remark or navigating my uneasiness when being praised for what I consider the basics.

Maybe I can start with a smile and a simple 'thank you' next time I hear a good word said towards my way...but even thinking about this is cause for concern.