Monday Another Monday
Monday was a day back to a typical routine. I try to make my routines less similar and somehow aim to change things. But, as you may already know from your specific life experience, it is difficult to break routines. They are familiar, somewhat comforting and welcomed at times, whether good or bad or boring. I work from home, mostly writing now and doing less of what I was focused on before; stock market trading. Some folks, especially some relatives of mine, think I do nothing and have no 'job,' and to be clear, they are right about the latter; I have no job. I haven't had a job for almost ten years now. I broke that boring routine and wish everyone else would ( or could ) break their work routine too; it's a one way benefit and you are 'in' the way, not the beneficiary. What I have done for the last ten years is by choice and it is a blessing to earn a living not having to leave the house or perform under someone, yet me not having to leave the house translates to some as 'he has no job / no income / no life.' I guess they don't follow me on FaceBook to see what kind of life I really have... nor do they read this blog. May God bless them.
So, I ceased market trading for now. Trading the market was consuming too much of my focus and it isn't as easy as anyone would like to say it is. Some nights I couldn't sleep and sometimes I would either wait in anticipation or desperation throughout the entire weekend, depending if I had held a position from Friday or whether some options were expiring soon. Trading is wagering and wagering is gambling. I did my best focusing on that for a certain amount of hours in the day and tried turning my brain off to it after the market would close, but that just wouldn't take. So I decided to stop it altogether to now focus on what better flows with my life and my passion; writing. I chose not to simply do what makes me more money ( which was the trading ) but to now do that which allows me to have peace and which doesn't get me so wound up. There are many ways to earn a living, and sadly not too many people realize the various ways available to them. Many lack creativity or faith in doing something outside of a typical job or what they are lead by the nose to do. With the market, even after learning how things move and getting over the butterflies of trading money which you may lose entirely ( I know what that feels like ), the market movement is not as 'predictable' as it was prior to the economic crisis of 2007 ( some traders who were trading prior to 2007 can attest to this ). Yet, it isn't like it was 'easy' before 2007 anyway. I've been focusing more and more on writing and it's paying the rent, so I can't complain and have no reason to. I am very happy and grateful for His blessing even in this and I am not consumed by my 'work' one bit. It is a joy and I only have myself to deal with. I have a good boss and I am never in fear of being fired... my exit option is to quit.
Monday morning my wife had an early start, so my usual routine is waking up with her, praying together, walking her to the car, kissing her goodbye and watching her as she turns the corner before I head back into the house. I did lay back down for a shallow snooze before getting up and posting a daily scripture for my FaceBook friends to read. Lately I've been including some of my thoughts regarding what the passages are saying, in hopes of pointing out something not usually noticed or a back-story to what is depicted. I sometimes get 'likes,' I sometimes don't... but I know the folks who were intended to read the message read it, for nothing happens outside His will. I don't post or share for likes... some people like me and like what I say... and some can't stand me nor what I say. May God bless them all. This passage comes to mind regarding what I just wrote:
For we are to God the pleasing aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are an aroma that brings death; to the other, an aroma that brings life. And who is equal to such a task? Unlike so many, we do not peddle the word of God for profit. On the contrary, in Christ we speak before God with sincerity, as those sent from God.
- 2 Corinthians 2:15-17
Monday morning I continue reading some obscure writings from some early disciples, those who came a generation or two after the first disciples who walked with Christ. One interesting work is by Hermas, who to some was the brother of the bishop of Rome at one time, to others he was a slave from an earlier time. You can read for yourself at the link about him. I search extra writings in search for other testimonies and evidence of God moving in other places and peoples not mentioned in what is called the bible. God didn't merely stop working or has kept silent when the first generation of Christ followers passed from the physical plain. Some of the things I read aligns perfectly with what has already been established in the gospel and subsequent letters. Some things are quite astounding and expands the myopic view which can come from reading the same passages, while other things don't seem to be genuine and are speaking about things which either are altogether false or seem to be an attempt of someone to raise themselves up in vain. They are all interesting nonetheless and care should be taken when looking at such writings, for just as some can distort and miss the message in scripture, it is much easier to misread something that may speak of mystery in a different way. I am open to allowing God show me things which my faith is yet able to allow me to see... and testing other things to find out if it is edifying or simply someone trying to gather listeners around them.
I decide to wash the bed linens after doing some exercise, and although it is like pulling teeth to get started doing any kind of physical exercise, I finally get into the movements and do the situps, leg lifts, pushups, back shrugs and some lunges with stretches in between all of these. I grabbed the jump rope and after just a few quick whips and jumps I was winded. I have a long way to go in the jump rope department, for they don't seem to be as easy as I remember when I was a kid on the school grounds. I saw some stars and felt a hot flash... no bueno.
After breaking a sweat for 30 minutes and doing three sets of each exercise, I shower and head to the laundromat. We have appliances I can use on the property, but my heart says to be around people to be seen and to see others, according to this:
“No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, so that those who come in may see the light. Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are healthy, your whole body also is full of light. But when they are unhealthy, your body also is full of darkness. See to it, then, that the light within you is not darkness. Therefore, if your whole body is full of light, and no part of it dark, it will be just as full of light as when a lamp shines its light on you.”
- Luke 11:33-36
I see the same small business owner and his friends on my way to the laundromat almost every time I venture out westbound on the nearest cross street. The first time I ran into him we spoke for over an hour while on my way to do the laundry. I say hello to him and his buddies, one of which I speak to occasionally when I pass by; he lives in a van parked across the street and seems to be happy and free from many of the cares that some are plagued with. He's funny and witty, quick with responses and remembers everything I have told him. He's seen me in my Cuba baseball cap and calls me Fidel sometimes. I enjoy chatting with him every chance I get.
Upon arriving at the laundromat, I find two vacant washing machines side by side, pick out some remnants of the prior washing, and prepare the load of whites / bed linens. I continue communicating with my wife and continue reading those obscure writings I mentioned. I usually give my wife a play by play of my day, asking her for suggestions about where to eat and what to order, but I can only stomach so much salad. I've grown accustomed to having meat with practically every meal and both her and I are trying to limit the red meat intake. She's doing much better with that effort than I am. But today I have the notion to stop by my favorite sushi place for my sushi fix. I haven't had sushi in quite some time and I crave it today.
I continue by daily good habit of sending petitions on behalf of who I see and situations I encounter; a couple of kids smoking pot in the parking lot, a young couple with an infant, several single people and single parents with boisterous children. One small child comes in with his older brother and their dad and go by the arcade games and starts kicking them repeatedly. I look over at him with a disapproving look and he continues kicking it while staring at me. He's a tough one, I can tell. So I finally give out a "hey" that was a bit louder than I would have liked it to be; it echoes throughout the building. The older man who walked in with them quickly comes over and ushers them away and towards his task of putting the clothes into the machine. But this little guy keeps eye contact with me and I with him... and he starts saying "why do you keep staring at me" and by the third time he says this he is smiling and I can't help but smile and start laughing. Kids. It looks like he and his older brother are with their grandparents, for I can hear him putting up a fuss when his grandmother starts disciplining him. He's a rebellious one... and it reminds me of someone I used to know / be.
After the clothes are done, I head back to the house, vacuum a bit, organize things and head out to a coffee shop next to the sushi place. This particular sushi restaurant has a happy-tummy-hour starting at 3pm and I have a couple of hours to go before that time, so I arrive at the coffee shop that is under a mile away and sit there to get some work done. Every table is full so I ask if I can share a table for four which is occupied by one gentleman in front of his computer and what looks like two cell phones or something like them. A table away there are two young ladies, maybe mid twenties in age, whose conversation I can't help but hear every now and again. They are talking about how God works things out. They reference God in the various topics they are discussing; challenges and triumphs. At first I am wondering if I am hearing them correctly and after focusing, I do hear them mentioning God. I am greatly encouraged to hear faith and hope in their conversation. Eventually I say hello when one of them turns towards my way and I tell her I happened to overhear their conversation and that I was very encouraged to hear parts of what they had said. She was all smiles and asked for my name and we shook hands. We exchanged a short kind gesture and we went back to what we were doing.
After a couple of hours there, I make my way next door to enjoy a feast of raw fish in various ways; rolls, with shrimp, with vegetables and laid on a packed length of rice. I am never too happy about eating by myself, but the sushi guy ( I sit at the sushi bar ) is kind and we share some words. I can't express how much I really enjoy eating this stuff... what a treat. After stuffing my face, I have a nice walk home to help digest what I just had. I plan on getting home and putting the linen on the bed and putting some clothes away, then watch a bit of an animal documentary series we purchased the other day at the $0.99 cent store. I grew up watching Wild America and I was so happy to have found two discs ( several hours ) of this for a dollar. So upon arriving home and getting some things done, I rested a bit, watching about an hour and a half of this series while also reading about the producer Marty and how his career started on a whim.
I continue chatting with my wife via email and she reminds me to give my dad a call. My wife read my heart in what I had planned on doing. We sometimes 'guess' what the other is thinking or thinking of doing. At first this was surprising for us, but now it simply confirms things and what He has done for us.
We had visited both of my 94 year old grandmothers yesterday. They are now living at different retirement homes, which I don't feel 100% about and deeply dislike the idea, but I haven't the choice to do anything about it other than visit them as often as possible. My wife and I had discussed about moving in with one of my grandmothers so we can look after her and possibly the other one as well so they wouldn't have to be in a facility, but some relatives just don't understand and are skeptical and suspicious. Today's 'modern' method of looking after the elderly is so broadly accepted that personally looking after them and not pursuing a career or whatever seems odd to most, and this is understandable. Yet, I can't help but see the selfishness of most, the demand of paying the bills and being in the machination of this 'modern' world. Some old people seem to be waiting for death to take them and forgotten are the times when all family members and relatives would do their part in supporting the prior generation in gratitude for what they've done for you when you were young. Sorry for the description, but this is honestly how I feel about the matter, even disgusted by my own selfishness and excuses.
When visiting my dad's mother, I called him on her cell phone so they can have a chat ( yes, one of my 94 year old grandmothers has a cell phone, but it is just for incoming calls from my dad, she can't punch the numbers to dial out ). They spoke for a bit and I overheard him ask her to tell me to give him a call. I hadn't spoken to my dad in quite some time. So I head back out, this time to a different coffee shop, one maybe half a mile or so away, and give my dad a call from there. We chat and laugh about the silly things my grandmother said yesterday and talk about the things she has forgotten. She has completely forgotten that her husband passed away from this plain prior to me being born. When she asks about him, she figures he is simply with another woman or he is mad at her and doesn't want to visit her. I tell her the truth and she always seems so surprised and a bit in disbelief. But after I tell her that he's waiting for her in heaven she quickly says "he can keep waiting, I'm in no hurry!" This always gets a laugh out of my wife and I, and yesterday was no different when she asked about him and she heard my response.
I get some more work done at the coffee shop after chatting with my dad for nearly a half hour ( somewhat of a record time on the phone with him ). I asked him specific questions about how he met my mom, when he arrived here from Cuba and when he had brought his parents over. I tell him I met a gentleman on the train a couple of weeks ago from the very same little town he is from; Caibarién. That man, when I told him about my dad being from that same town, couldn't believe it. My dad had the same response... and they both had the same response after thinking about it; laughter. That man's eyes had a similarity to my dads. My dad tells me he lived there until five, at which point he and his parents moved to the big city; Havana. I miss my dad and want to know more about him.
My wife mentors teenage girls on Monday evenings so I stay at the coffee shop late into the evening working, reading, researching and debating on FaceBook with some who are brothers and some who may consider me their foe or an enemy to their beliefs, but if they only knew that we are all one... one in the same and all relatives of a much bigger and mysterious family of sorts. It is interesting how two people can read one sentence and view different things. I always have to check my pride ( after the fact ) when thinking I know what I'm talking about and desire to correct the other debater.
We will all know the truth of all that matters one day soon enough.
So, I ceased market trading for now. Trading the market was consuming too much of my focus and it isn't as easy as anyone would like to say it is. Some nights I couldn't sleep and sometimes I would either wait in anticipation or desperation throughout the entire weekend, depending if I had held a position from Friday or whether some options were expiring soon. Trading is wagering and wagering is gambling. I did my best focusing on that for a certain amount of hours in the day and tried turning my brain off to it after the market would close, but that just wouldn't take. So I decided to stop it altogether to now focus on what better flows with my life and my passion; writing. I chose not to simply do what makes me more money ( which was the trading ) but to now do that which allows me to have peace and which doesn't get me so wound up. There are many ways to earn a living, and sadly not too many people realize the various ways available to them. Many lack creativity or faith in doing something outside of a typical job or what they are lead by the nose to do. With the market, even after learning how things move and getting over the butterflies of trading money which you may lose entirely ( I know what that feels like ), the market movement is not as 'predictable' as it was prior to the economic crisis of 2007 ( some traders who were trading prior to 2007 can attest to this ). Yet, it isn't like it was 'easy' before 2007 anyway. I've been focusing more and more on writing and it's paying the rent, so I can't complain and have no reason to. I am very happy and grateful for His blessing even in this and I am not consumed by my 'work' one bit. It is a joy and I only have myself to deal with. I have a good boss and I am never in fear of being fired... my exit option is to quit.
Monday morning my wife had an early start, so my usual routine is waking up with her, praying together, walking her to the car, kissing her goodbye and watching her as she turns the corner before I head back into the house. I did lay back down for a shallow snooze before getting up and posting a daily scripture for my FaceBook friends to read. Lately I've been including some of my thoughts regarding what the passages are saying, in hopes of pointing out something not usually noticed or a back-story to what is depicted. I sometimes get 'likes,' I sometimes don't... but I know the folks who were intended to read the message read it, for nothing happens outside His will. I don't post or share for likes... some people like me and like what I say... and some can't stand me nor what I say. May God bless them all. This passage comes to mind regarding what I just wrote:
For we are to God the pleasing aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are an aroma that brings death; to the other, an aroma that brings life. And who is equal to such a task? Unlike so many, we do not peddle the word of God for profit. On the contrary, in Christ we speak before God with sincerity, as those sent from God.
- 2 Corinthians 2:15-17
Monday morning I continue reading some obscure writings from some early disciples, those who came a generation or two after the first disciples who walked with Christ. One interesting work is by Hermas, who to some was the brother of the bishop of Rome at one time, to others he was a slave from an earlier time. You can read for yourself at the link about him. I search extra writings in search for other testimonies and evidence of God moving in other places and peoples not mentioned in what is called the bible. God didn't merely stop working or has kept silent when the first generation of Christ followers passed from the physical plain. Some of the things I read aligns perfectly with what has already been established in the gospel and subsequent letters. Some things are quite astounding and expands the myopic view which can come from reading the same passages, while other things don't seem to be genuine and are speaking about things which either are altogether false or seem to be an attempt of someone to raise themselves up in vain. They are all interesting nonetheless and care should be taken when looking at such writings, for just as some can distort and miss the message in scripture, it is much easier to misread something that may speak of mystery in a different way. I am open to allowing God show me things which my faith is yet able to allow me to see... and testing other things to find out if it is edifying or simply someone trying to gather listeners around them.
I decide to wash the bed linens after doing some exercise, and although it is like pulling teeth to get started doing any kind of physical exercise, I finally get into the movements and do the situps, leg lifts, pushups, back shrugs and some lunges with stretches in between all of these. I grabbed the jump rope and after just a few quick whips and jumps I was winded. I have a long way to go in the jump rope department, for they don't seem to be as easy as I remember when I was a kid on the school grounds. I saw some stars and felt a hot flash... no bueno.
After breaking a sweat for 30 minutes and doing three sets of each exercise, I shower and head to the laundromat. We have appliances I can use on the property, but my heart says to be around people to be seen and to see others, according to this:
“No one lights a lamp and puts it in a place where it will be hidden, or under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, so that those who come in may see the light. Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eyes are healthy, your whole body also is full of light. But when they are unhealthy, your body also is full of darkness. See to it, then, that the light within you is not darkness. Therefore, if your whole body is full of light, and no part of it dark, it will be just as full of light as when a lamp shines its light on you.”
- Luke 11:33-36
I see the same small business owner and his friends on my way to the laundromat almost every time I venture out westbound on the nearest cross street. The first time I ran into him we spoke for over an hour while on my way to do the laundry. I say hello to him and his buddies, one of which I speak to occasionally when I pass by; he lives in a van parked across the street and seems to be happy and free from many of the cares that some are plagued with. He's funny and witty, quick with responses and remembers everything I have told him. He's seen me in my Cuba baseball cap and calls me Fidel sometimes. I enjoy chatting with him every chance I get.
Upon arriving at the laundromat, I find two vacant washing machines side by side, pick out some remnants of the prior washing, and prepare the load of whites / bed linens. I continue communicating with my wife and continue reading those obscure writings I mentioned. I usually give my wife a play by play of my day, asking her for suggestions about where to eat and what to order, but I can only stomach so much salad. I've grown accustomed to having meat with practically every meal and both her and I are trying to limit the red meat intake. She's doing much better with that effort than I am. But today I have the notion to stop by my favorite sushi place for my sushi fix. I haven't had sushi in quite some time and I crave it today.
I continue by daily good habit of sending petitions on behalf of who I see and situations I encounter; a couple of kids smoking pot in the parking lot, a young couple with an infant, several single people and single parents with boisterous children. One small child comes in with his older brother and their dad and go by the arcade games and starts kicking them repeatedly. I look over at him with a disapproving look and he continues kicking it while staring at me. He's a tough one, I can tell. So I finally give out a "hey" that was a bit louder than I would have liked it to be; it echoes throughout the building. The older man who walked in with them quickly comes over and ushers them away and towards his task of putting the clothes into the machine. But this little guy keeps eye contact with me and I with him... and he starts saying "why do you keep staring at me" and by the third time he says this he is smiling and I can't help but smile and start laughing. Kids. It looks like he and his older brother are with their grandparents, for I can hear him putting up a fuss when his grandmother starts disciplining him. He's a rebellious one... and it reminds me of someone I used to know / be.
After the clothes are done, I head back to the house, vacuum a bit, organize things and head out to a coffee shop next to the sushi place. This particular sushi restaurant has a happy-tummy-hour starting at 3pm and I have a couple of hours to go before that time, so I arrive at the coffee shop that is under a mile away and sit there to get some work done. Every table is full so I ask if I can share a table for four which is occupied by one gentleman in front of his computer and what looks like two cell phones or something like them. A table away there are two young ladies, maybe mid twenties in age, whose conversation I can't help but hear every now and again. They are talking about how God works things out. They reference God in the various topics they are discussing; challenges and triumphs. At first I am wondering if I am hearing them correctly and after focusing, I do hear them mentioning God. I am greatly encouraged to hear faith and hope in their conversation. Eventually I say hello when one of them turns towards my way and I tell her I happened to overhear their conversation and that I was very encouraged to hear parts of what they had said. She was all smiles and asked for my name and we shook hands. We exchanged a short kind gesture and we went back to what we were doing.
After a couple of hours there, I make my way next door to enjoy a feast of raw fish in various ways; rolls, with shrimp, with vegetables and laid on a packed length of rice. I am never too happy about eating by myself, but the sushi guy ( I sit at the sushi bar ) is kind and we share some words. I can't express how much I really enjoy eating this stuff... what a treat. After stuffing my face, I have a nice walk home to help digest what I just had. I plan on getting home and putting the linen on the bed and putting some clothes away, then watch a bit of an animal documentary series we purchased the other day at the $0.99 cent store. I grew up watching Wild America and I was so happy to have found two discs ( several hours ) of this for a dollar. So upon arriving home and getting some things done, I rested a bit, watching about an hour and a half of this series while also reading about the producer Marty and how his career started on a whim.
I continue chatting with my wife via email and she reminds me to give my dad a call. My wife read my heart in what I had planned on doing. We sometimes 'guess' what the other is thinking or thinking of doing. At first this was surprising for us, but now it simply confirms things and what He has done for us.
We had visited both of my 94 year old grandmothers yesterday. They are now living at different retirement homes, which I don't feel 100% about and deeply dislike the idea, but I haven't the choice to do anything about it other than visit them as often as possible. My wife and I had discussed about moving in with one of my grandmothers so we can look after her and possibly the other one as well so they wouldn't have to be in a facility, but some relatives just don't understand and are skeptical and suspicious. Today's 'modern' method of looking after the elderly is so broadly accepted that personally looking after them and not pursuing a career or whatever seems odd to most, and this is understandable. Yet, I can't help but see the selfishness of most, the demand of paying the bills and being in the machination of this 'modern' world. Some old people seem to be waiting for death to take them and forgotten are the times when all family members and relatives would do their part in supporting the prior generation in gratitude for what they've done for you when you were young. Sorry for the description, but this is honestly how I feel about the matter, even disgusted by my own selfishness and excuses.
When visiting my dad's mother, I called him on her cell phone so they can have a chat ( yes, one of my 94 year old grandmothers has a cell phone, but it is just for incoming calls from my dad, she can't punch the numbers to dial out ). They spoke for a bit and I overheard him ask her to tell me to give him a call. I hadn't spoken to my dad in quite some time. So I head back out, this time to a different coffee shop, one maybe half a mile or so away, and give my dad a call from there. We chat and laugh about the silly things my grandmother said yesterday and talk about the things she has forgotten. She has completely forgotten that her husband passed away from this plain prior to me being born. When she asks about him, she figures he is simply with another woman or he is mad at her and doesn't want to visit her. I tell her the truth and she always seems so surprised and a bit in disbelief. But after I tell her that he's waiting for her in heaven she quickly says "he can keep waiting, I'm in no hurry!" This always gets a laugh out of my wife and I, and yesterday was no different when she asked about him and she heard my response.
I get some more work done at the coffee shop after chatting with my dad for nearly a half hour ( somewhat of a record time on the phone with him ). I asked him specific questions about how he met my mom, when he arrived here from Cuba and when he had brought his parents over. I tell him I met a gentleman on the train a couple of weeks ago from the very same little town he is from; Caibarién. That man, when I told him about my dad being from that same town, couldn't believe it. My dad had the same response... and they both had the same response after thinking about it; laughter. That man's eyes had a similarity to my dads. My dad tells me he lived there until five, at which point he and his parents moved to the big city; Havana. I miss my dad and want to know more about him.
My wife mentors teenage girls on Monday evenings so I stay at the coffee shop late into the evening working, reading, researching and debating on FaceBook with some who are brothers and some who may consider me their foe or an enemy to their beliefs, but if they only knew that we are all one... one in the same and all relatives of a much bigger and mysterious family of sorts. It is interesting how two people can read one sentence and view different things. I always have to check my pride ( after the fact ) when thinking I know what I'm talking about and desire to correct the other debater.
We will all know the truth of all that matters one day soon enough.
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